The article recounts the author’s journey of leaving an arranged marriage at 19, choosing a life of her own in America. Initially, her family believed she was going to school; in reality, she was escaping a scripted life. The man she was supposed to marry, a childhood crush, represented a double standard of expectation. Despite familial pressure, she flew to the U.S. to attend graduate school, where her fiancé proposed, but she soon realized that this life didn’t align with her desires.
Facing isolation and cultural disconnection, she navigated challenges that deepened her estrangement from her family. Over time, she fell in love with an American classmate, Gerrit, whose kindness contrasted with her previous experiences. After various hardships and lessons about independence, she eventually secured a job that led to stability and a green card.
The author married Gerrit and began to reconcile with her family slowly, but tragedy struck when her parents died shortly after reuniting, leaving her with unresolved feelings of loss and belonging. She reflects on the complexities of her choices, acknowledging both freedom and loss. The piece emphasizes that while she built a life of her choosing, the emotional costs linger, blending themes of resilience, love, and sacrifice.
Source link


